HDNL delivery

It may be obvious I’m waiting on a parcel:

Amazon: “Don’t worry Mr Williams, we’ve corrected the address and have confirmed with HDNL that your order will arrive at your home on Saturday”
HDNL sniggers in background.

HDNL: “Listen, we tried to deliver to your office,  You weren’t there.  Later”

HDNL: “Listen, we’ve been told that your office is no longer at this address”
Me: “By who?”
HDNL: “Yeah I dunno.  But it’s going back to Amazon now”

HDNL: “Hey, remember that parcel we were returning to Amazon.  Well we’re going to deliver it today instead”
Me: “Hooray!”
HDNL: “So it’ll be at your home address in the next 12 hours”
Me: “Hoora – wait, what?  I’m at work though.  You said you wouldn’t use my home address unless I asked you to.  And I didn’t
HDNL: “Whatevers!”

HDNL: “Listen, remember that time when we said we’d deliver your parcel today?”
Me: “Yes”
HDNL: “Later, sucka!”

HNDL: “Okay, you can have your parcel today.  The driver’s left it round the back of your office, in a ‘secluded place’”
Me: “But round the back of my office is a pub.  A pub isn’t a secluded place”
HNDL: “Maybe it’s at your house”
Me: “But it was supposed to come here.  And if it can be left in my garden, why wasn’t it on Tuesday when it went to my house and no one was home”
“HNDL: “Lol!”


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